| Relationships are your self development jet plane to | | | | your partner. |
| enlightenment. They will provide you with the most | | | | Trial No 2: Conflict |
| crucial lessons to learn, always pushing the most | | | | Conflict, whether openly discussed or avoided, is part |
| sensitive buttons, and help you heal any yet to be | | | | of a committed union. Experiencing conflict from time |
| resolved childhood wounds. | | | | to time is normal; the question is how you and your |
| Every relationship will have its challenges sooner or | | | | partner are handling it. Research has found that if |
| later. If you have just started with a new relationship | | | | interactions between couples, on average, are five |
| you might say: 'This person is different than my | | | | positive interactions to one negative then the |
| previous partner, we are such an amazing match - | | | | relationship is healthy. Interactions are anything from |
| we never argue.' Wait a few more years and I can | | | | a look, a touch or a word of encouragement. |
| promise you will find some challenges or else you | | | | Remember that body language speaks louder than |
| might be great at denial. | | | | words! |
| The trials of relationship are what helps you become | | | | Trial No 3: Monotony |
| the person you will be in future. If you look back | | | | If you feel bored with your partner it's time to spice |
| over your history of relating, this does not just | | | | it up. In order to keep any friendship interactive and |
| include intimate relationships, you will find that they | | | | alive you need to nurture it. Some people at this |
| have shaped you and molded you in amazing ways. | | | | stage believe that 'the love has gone' and they might |
| Trial No 1: Differentiation | | | | wonder if it's time to leave the relationship. Often it is |
| There comes a point in any relationship when you | | | | not that the love has gone but that the flame of |
| realise that your partner is different to what you | | | | love has not been adequately nurtured and tended |
| believed at the beginning. This stage of differentiation | | | | to. |
| is where many leave the relationship in | | | | There are obviously more than the 3 trials in any |
| disappointment. If you realise that this process will | | | | committed relationship. If your commitment is strong |
| happen with anyone you will be better prepared. | | | | I believe that most trials can be overcome, |
| Accept that your partner, just like you, has their | | | | sometimes by your initiative and at other times with |
| flaws and annoyances. This is your lesson at | | | | professional help of a coach, counsellor or mediator. |
| accepting what is and resisting wanting to change | | | | |